The thief...

This is a continuation of the blog about Kenneth and his cancer...it is just directly below...if you've not read it, you might want to do that first and then come back and read this...

Well, the thieves are working overtime again. This morning, the maid next door began yelling for Freddy to come help her. He ran to the side wall where he can see in to the back yard of that neighbor’s house and she came running out, yelling that there was a robber in the yard. Jim went up the driveway with Freddy and as Freddy got over there, the guy was gone. The maid said that he had on a red shirt.

Evidently, he had climbed up the utility pole and jumped over to a tree within the walled area. She happened to be in the house and looked out the back window and saw him hiding by the water tank. He must have reversed the process to get back out of the yard.
Jim came back down and went to our back deck. He saw a group of four guys standing down on the road behind our house looking around and pointing to the back of the house next door. One of them had on a red shirt. When they saw Jim on the deck, they turn and ran up the hill in to the trees.

He wasn’t able to get anything but it was still a bit unnerving for all of us. Freddy wanted me to call Susanna so he could talk to her. He told her he thought we needed to talk with the owners on both sides of us and tell them to put pressure on the police to clear out the community of squatters that have built up behind us. The house right behind us is still empty but on the hill behind and to the right of us, there are more plastic and wood shacks going up every day. I’m not sure it will do any good as the police don’t care.

Susanna did talk to us about having a dog. She wants us to take Pixie. She said she thinks it would be good for Pixie and for us. We would love to have her but I am afraid she would be “homesick” and I don’t want anything to happen to her here. Susanna said her in-compound neighbor who is actually her landlord, now has a lab, a German shepherd and two more German shepherd puppies. So she feels she’s well-protected in that area. I don’t know how much of a guard dog she would be but she would definitely bark and would let us know if someone were around…but that only works if we’re here. We are talking about trying it but also going ahead and getting a big dog puppy to be a an outside dog and act as a greater presence and deterrent to someone thinking about trying to climb the wall here and jumping in.

Felix, our night guard, is Freddy’s brother-in-law. Freddy filled him in on what happened today and now he’s very concerned. He is talking about needing “arms” and such. I am praying we don’t ever have to get to that point. I have such an aversion to guns anyway…I just can’t even imagine having one around our house. We told him we were talking about getting a dog. He wants a full-blown, fully grown guard dog tonight! That would be nice but it’s not going to happen.

But we weren’t the only ones to have excitement. Susanna’s truck was broken in to today! She was at a coffee shop having a meeting when she heard her car alarm go off. By the time she got outside and the guard got around to that part of the lot, the robbers were gone. They had jimmied the lock on her door to access the car. They were able to grab her nurse's bag but didn't have time to get in to her glove box.

We have been reminded the last few days that the enemy has come to steal, kill and destroy. We have to consciously remind ourselves that greater is He that is in us than he that is in the world. Now, back to Kenneth’s story.

We stayed busy here yesterday morning, as we still didn’t have our car back. I got another load of laundry done and spent some time researching on the internet what I could about Kenneth’s disease. I kept trying to find some sort of medical loophole.

Susanna picked us up about 2:30. We had to go run an errand and then drove up to the North Highway to go to the filling station where we were to meet Miguel, Danelia and Kenneth. We got there almost thirty minutes early. There’s never any good way to accurately calculate how long a trip through Managua is going to take. Traffic is so unpredictable that the same trip one day can take 30 minutes and another day almost an hour.

They arrived exactly on time climbed in to the car. The stress was evident on Danelia’s face. She looked exhausted. She said that Kenneth had a rough night the night before. She didn’t say much more. Kenneth was as loving as ever. He had brought a small baggie of tiny little plastic army men and the only sign that he was nervous was the tight grip he had on that little baggie. Miguel and Jim talked a bit.

It took less than 10 minutes to get to the doctor’s office. When we got out of the car, Miguel was laughing and told me that he knew I didn’t know how close we were to the Oriental Market. He was right, I didn’t. We had to park a little bit down the street from the office and there were about 5 young men just standing along a wall by the office. Miguel made sure he walked right beside me. I have to admit I always feel a bit safer in neighborhoods like that when he’s with us. He’s a good friend in that regard, always looking out for us.

The doctor came to the door of his office to unlock it and let us in. He locked it again behind us. Another reminder that we weren’t in the best of neighborhoods, I suppose. We all got settled in our various places. Susanna, Danelia and Kenneth were in the doctor’s office. Susanna had me come in so I could hear the conversation, although much of it I didn’t understand. I think that was probably a blessing. Kenneth kept taking hold of my hand or rubbing my arm. I think he just needed someone touching him at that moment. Danelia was being questioned by the doctor and at first, wouldn’t even make eye contact with him. She kept looking down at the floor or over at me. But finally, she got up the courage to meet the doctor’s eyes and I could tell from the sound of her voice, she was gaining confidence in talking with him.

He would ask why she would say something or why she thought something. He wasn’t rude but he was direct. She never backed down and always gave him an answer. He asked to see Kenneth’s records. He began looking at each one of the x-rays and cat scans and slowly going over the reports. He asked Danelia how long Kenneth had chemo. When she explained that the hospital then gave him radiation following the chemo, he was not pleased.

He explained why he didn’t think that was the best course of action with the type of cancer Kenneth has and the form it’s taken. He then wanted to examine Kenneth. He was very gentle with Kenneth, explaining each thing he was going to do before he did it. After the exam, they all came back in the office and sat down. Danelia asked the doctor to be honest with her about his thoughts. He asked for Kenneth to go in the other room. We all knew at that moment that the news wasn’t going to be good.

Jim took Kenneth in to the waiting area where Miguel was and Jim sat down on the floor with Kenneth. They sat and played army men and at one point, Jim and Kenneth’s “explosions” were getting so loud that I had to ask them to tone it down a bit. They both smiled at me and continued to play. The whole thing was surreal. I stood and looked at Kenneth on the floor. He looked just like any other little boy playing except for the ever-present mask on his face. My mind just couldn’t grab hold of what I knew was being said. My eyes saw a precious little boy who loves Jesus and who would grow in to a man who would honor God with his life. My ears were hearing that he wasn’t going to grow much older at all.

The doctor, while not wanting to take away all hope, neither wanted to give Danelia any false hope. She is one of the most controlled women I’ve ever met but the grim prognosis was too much to bear. The doctor told her that she could give Kenneth whatever he wanted to eat and she asked about candy. It surprised me that she asked that as she knows that as a cancer patient, he’s not to have a lot of sugar. We had just talked about that last Saturday. The doctor gently said it wasn’t important and reiterated to let him eat whatever he wanted. She began to cry. The doctor said that was one reason he didn’t want to treat pediatric cancer patients…he said it’s too hard when you have a case like Kenneth’s.

I asked Susanna to ask him about trying another course of chemo. He said that the doctors at Mascota had already administered radiation and because of that, he didn’t think the chemo would be nearly as effective on the cancer but would be even harder on his system. He said he didn’t know if the Mascota Hospital even had the chemo that Kenneth needed. I told him we would pay for private administration of the chemo. He then explained to us that money wasn’t the issue but rather lack of availability of those specific chemo drugs. He said that they are very hard to come by and when doctors or hospitals do get them, the protocol is to save them to use for those cancer patients who have a greater chance of survival. Kenneth doesn’t qualify. I then asked if we could bring them in from the U.S. for Kenneth’s use.

He thought for a minute and then told us that he would call the two co-heads of the oncology department at Mascota and talk to them about possibly taking Kenneth’s case. He said that the ultimate decision would be up to them. Again, he admitted that he’s not an expert in pediatrics but he does know cancer and he’s not sure Kenneth could withstand another course of chemo.
He then asked what type of pain medication Kenneth was on and how frequently. I could tell he wanted to change the subject. My frustration level was rising. I wanted to talk about a cure…he was talking about pain management. I could feel my heart pounding. Danelia told him that he was taking 10 mg. of morphine every 12 hours. She said that there was another pain medication that he also took but that the hospital only gave him morphine this time. The doctor wrote out a prescription for the additional pain medication and I told her we would buy it on the way home. Now expressionless, she nodded her head. The enemy had crept in to that room and was trying to steal the last hope that woman had.

He sat there for a minute and then reiterated he would call the people at Mascota and then he would call Susanna and let her know what he found out. We all thanked him and as Danelia was helping Kenneth gather his things, I paid the bill. We finished with the niceties and left. The quiet was unsettling. As we were pulling away from the curb, I looked up. I don’t ever remember seeing a sky like the one we saw yesterday. The sun rays shining from behind the clouds were breathtaking. We all noticed them. I kept thinking that it was God’s way of reminding us He is still in control of all things.

Susanna turned the corner and if the clouds weren’t beautiful enough to astound us, in the sky ahead of us was a complete rainbow. Each band’s color was vivid and distinct. Kenneth started talking about the rainbow and how it was a sign from God to Noah. I could feel the tears start down my cheeks. Maybe it was a sign for us, too.

We drove them home to Tipitapa. The conversation was pretty sparse. I think each of us were lost in our own thoughts. I was trying to keep the tears from overtaking me. Suddenly, I felt a small hand on my shoulder. I turned around and Kenneth had leaned forward just to put his hand on my shoulder. I patted his hand and he took hold of my fingers and squeezed them. I think he was trying to comfort me. How crazy is that?

When we got to Miguel’s, everyone got out except Danelia, Susanna and me. Susanna began to talk gently with Danelia and told her that God has never promised us that our way would be easy but that He didn’t promise us that He would never leave us alone. She nodded in affirmation and once again the tears started. Susanna told her that sometimes we just need someone to listen to the hurts of our hearts. Danelia broke down and sobbed. The tears were contagious.

It was such a tender and private time that I don’t feel comfortable sharing all that was said. Suffice to say that this woman is struggling with every fiber of her being to save her child in spite of all those who say that there isn’t anything more that can be done. She desperately wants to trust God’s plan, regardless the outcome and she just as desperately wants to hold on forever to her firstborn.

For about 30 minutes, we just let her talk and cry and pour out all the worries and concerns that she’s been keeping bottled up for over a year. The flood of raw emotion pouring out of that shattered woman was unbelievable. She was bent over almost in two, the pain of her circumstances preventing her from even sitting up straight.

Susanna asked me if I would pray and she would translate. We were still facing the back seat and took Danelia’s hands in our own and formed a tightly bound circle. It reminded me of a figurine I used to have in my old Sunday school class of three praying women holding hands. There is something about that bond of intimacy that occurs when you hold someone’s hand as you pray for them. Danelia was no longer just Miguel’s sister or Kenneth’s mother…she was my friend who is living everyday her most dreaded nightmare. I want so desperately to do what I can’t do and that’s make it all better – for Kenneth, for her…for us.

We finished our conversation and got ready to leave. There wasn’t much more to say. My own tears began and have continued off and on since. Sleep was elusive for most of the night last night. We were up a little after 5:00 this morning. I've spent a good part of the day alternating between crying and praying...I want to do something…

I decided to send out a prayer request to a group of folks that I believe will pray for Kenneth and the miracle he so obviously needs at this time. I’ve been encouraged by many of the responses. Several have said they will share this need with their churches and prayer groups. And now, I’m asking you…will you please pray for Kenneth? Will you ask your church, your Bible study, your Sunday school class, your prayer group to pray for him? His name is Kenneth Arturo Gonzales Parrales and he’s nine years old…nine years old!

I told Danelia last evening that I was going to ask you…she nodded her head and gave me a slight smile. I think there was a glimmer of hope in her eyes…and I think I heard that despicable thief who wants to steal our joy…I think I might have heard him groan.